What's On Your Bookshelf?
And do you need to rethink it?
I was recently at a male friend’s house and I was drawn to his bookshelves, as I always am in other people’s houses. I noticed something interesting: there were no books by women. When I pointed this out to him, he was quite shocked. He looked to the bookshelf, poring over the titles and said ‘there’s one.’ Turns out it was mine and I had left it with him before going back to Mexico when I was last in London.
“I just pick up books I’m drawn to,” he said. “Just the themes I’m interested in.”
“What themes are you interested in?” I asked.
He mentioned some to which I offered female authors writing on the topics.
“You know very few men read books by women,” I said. Reading about this had really struck me. Especially as a woman who grew up reading sooo many men. As a woman who took English literature A Level and read, Shakespeare, Chaucer, Steinbeck, Tennessee Williams, Hartley….the list goes on. I’m actually trying to think of a woman that we read at school and I can’t.
“It’s not entirely your fault though,” I said conceding to my friend a little. “Books are marketed to men and women differently. Do you think you are more likely to pick up a darkly coloured book than one with bright colours?”
“Yes, for sure,” he said. “I’d never thought about it but yes, I probably am influenced by the marketing.”
I asked if I could curate him a list of books to read by women and he loved the idea. I asked about all his favourite themes. I went to the local charity shop and bought the first three….
A few weeks later I met that same friend and another close friend of ours at the pub. Our other friend mentioned that a woman had been upset with him when he’d said all his favourite authors were men.
“Do you read books by women?” I asked, and he paused for a moment to think about it. He’s very well read so I was surprised by the pause as he really tried to think.
“It’s totally fine to say your favourite writers are men,” I said eventually. “So long as you’ve also read women.”
We went on to have a longer discussion about it all.
The following day, I was lucky enough to be invited to the Women’s Prize for Fiction party. It was a glorious event, championing women writers. But something that I hadn’t realised until I reflected on it was that it was attended by 90% women. I saw Richard Curtis, a male agent, a book influencer, and a few other men, mostly partners and spouses of the women in attendance. Does the Booker Prize have this disparity in attendance? Do male authors and readers think the Women’s Prize, which honours excellence in fiction and non-fiction has nothing to do with them? Were many men invited?
This was all playing on my mind when I turned up at another male friend’s house this week. We were chatting in the kitchen and he walked over to his bookshelf and came back with a book he’d recently loved. I noticed it was written by a woman- but it was a popular book so it could just be luck. Then further in the conversation he went to grab another book, also written by a woman, then a third. The conversation was not about female authors and I hadn’t mentioned any of the thoughts I’d been having to him. Once a fourth book was mentioned, written by a woman, I realised I was having a visceral feeling. I’m safe here the feeling told me. Just seeing that this friend’s reading list was so full of women and it wasn’t something he was showing off it was just something that was a fact, made me feel safe. It made me feel like I could be there in my wholeness, like I wouldn’t have to work so hard to explain my experience in the world. It felt so good!
I love all my friends mentioned here and I’m happy to curate lists and open up this discussion because it’s wildly important to me and because I understand that there can be blind spots (there’s an even greater discussion to be had about reading only white authors). And we live in a world where many men seem to have got a memo that things to do with women have nothing to do with them. That makes me sad (and often angry) and causes so many of our societal ills.
On a lovely note, the first friend I mentioned here, now checks in as he finishes each book (he’s such a fast reader, I need to curate a longer list) and we discuss it and he gives them a rating. It’s really fun and connecting, even when he gives a book I thought was a 10/10 a 7/10 :).
So if you are a guy reading this, maybe take a little look at your bookshelf. Is it very male-leaning? Are you surprised by that? If so, maybe make it your mission to read more female authors for this second half of the year. Small things change the world.
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Here in Baja Sur, 'm in a women's book group--of one Mexican woman and the rest white gringas--where we read books by Latinas. This focus has been wonderful and edifying.
I've just checked my "to be read" pile and they are all women. And my bookshelves are about half and half now. Though I do think that has happened as I've got older. But I don't read enough non-white authors or LBGTQ+ writers so need to rectify that.
If I didn't know the author it would be the cover that drew me and I do think, again as I've got older, I don't like things that, from the cover, look as if they will be gory or bleak. Though a lot of what I read is bleak but the cover has drawn me in some how
I remember when my daughter studies English Lit is was mainly male writers. They did do the Brontës but a lot of what they explored was their father and brother's influences, how living on the York moors would have affected their writing. I've just recently read somewhere that the sisters went to London!!! Well that never came up in A level Lit!!!